Last week I found myself in an awkward situation. Maybe you have been there a time or two yourself. Here is my story...
This morning I am sitting in Starbucks for the second time
waiting for someone who has not shown up. It is my second attempt on an
appointment with this person and getting together was his idea. He seemed rather
embarrassed when I talked to him after he missed the first appointment and here
I am again. I really thought he would show up this time.
How many appointments do you make with someone and how long
do you wait before you bail? This is someone I’ve known for over a year, but we will not be working together at this point. And, I feel like I can't refer people to someone who doesn't feel I am important enough to keep an appointment.
To make matters worse, one guy is talking loudly on his cell
phone and a couple is having a conversation with someone on speaker phone. The loud guy is talking to his appointment who did not show up either. I clearly heard him say, "That's okay. Whenever you can get here is fine."
I
have resorted to my headphones, which I don’t like to do because I’m liable to
start singing without realizing it. That will not be good in any way.
What is the protocol for being on time?
In my opinion, you
should always be 5-10 minutes early. Then you are never late. I get into panic
attacks if I am stuck in traffic and I think I’m going to be late for anything,
even if it’s just dinner with good friends and there is no time constraint.
Maybe that’s just me.
In the age of cell phones that have alerts to let you know
an appointment is coming up or reminders that can let you know you need to do
something, there is really no excuse.
When I first contacted the guy after
missing the first appointment, he doubted me, checked his phone’s calendar and
admitted I was right. Ouch. Doubting me? That hurt right off the bat. I should
have just said forget it, but I was hoping that we could at least share referrals.
If I’m going to be late, I text or call the person to let
them know. I had an appointment last week and the guy was 30 minutes late. He
messaged me three times letting me know there was an accident on the beltway
and that he was trying to get to the appointment. However, this time I have been disrespected – and for the second time.
Last night I considered sending a reminder email, especially because he missed the first appointment, but I figured we're all adults here and should be able to keep an appointment. Seems like I got that wrong.
I will admit, I missed a doctor’s appointment once. I spent the day with that nagging feeling that I was forgetting
something, but couldn’t remember what it was. Two hours after the appointment,
it hit me. I was embarrassed and felt terrible especially since I would
probably be charged for it. Granted, that was years before Siri was around to remind me. I made absolutely sure I did not miss the second appointment!
Should I be insulted? I am. Should my feelings be hurt? They
are. Should I just chalk it up to experience and enjoy my Starbucks latte? I
should, but I can’t.
OMG. The guy I’m supposed to be meeting just walked in the door and sat down with
someone else six feet away from me. Now I’m really mad and in a completely
awkward situation. I have no idea what to do. I feel like a complete idiot. I am embarrassed, although I should not be.
This is crazy. I should not have started writing this and instead left when I
had a chance for a clean break.
Life sure does throw me curve balls. Did he see me sitting
here with my headphones and typing away at my keyboard or was he focused on his
OTHER appointment with the loud guy I heard talking on the phone earlier.
Apparently, he forgot that appointment too. I am seething…
This has become too
angry to be a blog. It has become a rant.
The guy didn’t even go up and get coffee, offering me an
escape route. I am trapped like a wounded animal. Being generally
non-confrontational, I am at a loss. I just want to escape with what little
dignity I have. At least his back is to me as I contemplate my predicament.
What would you do if you found yourself in this situation?